Thursday, June 18, 2009

How to wake up lazy skin

Miss Grimke: Richard Bradley is like that fly Obama whacked. Do you want us to swat him for you?

DGF: Who is Richard Bradley?

Miss Grimke: He blah-blahs about how you won't talk to the press about Harvard's going broke and other things.

DGF: Oh that guy. I'll contribute to history's first draft when I'm good and ready. Too much is at stake on too many fronts and too much is still too raw. Nothing is simple enough for sound bites and being second-guessed by people who consider themselves experts on this and that. The potential consequences of distortions are too dire.

Miss Grimke: Okay, whatever. I read in the FT that you should not use moisturizer because it makes your skin lazy.

DGF: Do tell. Well I don't use moisturizer and my skin is already incredibly lazy. It just sits there and sags.

Miss Grimke: I quit using it for about a week and my skin finally woke up and nagged me about neglecting this blog.

DGF: Well whoop de whoop.

Miss Grimke: You're not in a very good mood are you.

DGF: No comment.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

The future brightens

You read it here first: DGF has selected a replacement for her executive vice president, Ed Forst, who has resigned. In one of her many strokes of brilliance she has hired Zoe Warren-Washburne, the tough, smart, talented former first officer on Serenity, the legendary salvage ship. She is just what DGF needs, a tactician who has worked with the best and prevailed through many trials by fire. She also shares DGF’s attitude toward fashion—wear whatever works best for the job and then forget about it. As with DGF, the result is exactly correct and eminently flattering.

From Drew’s official press release: “I am extremely pleased that Zoe Warren-Washburne has agreed to come to Harvard and serve as the University’s second executive vice president. She brings deep experience with a large, complex, and universal organization, a proven track record in managing the functions that will be central to her new role, and an outstanding reputation for her effective leadership style.

“We have important work ahead of us, with new challenges unfolding daily, and Zoe’s leadership and experience will help ensure that our administrative capacity can support our academic ambitions at the level of excellence they deserve, despite our need to address urgent and rare issues.” Faust continued.

Warren-Washburne said, "The decision to leave Serenity was extremely difficult. In my many years as First Officer I formed lasting and deep relationships with the captain and crew, but they understand my desire to work in a new environment with new challenges and to spend quality time with my feet planted on the good ship Earth.

“I am ready and eager to serve my new captain: Drew Gilpin Faust.”

As First Officer Warren-Washburne became known for her intense loyalty—which extended to her refusal to steer her boss wrong. She sizes up complex situations rapidly with uncanny accuracy. She is also an accurate shot. Her weapon of choice is her sawed-off rifle, which she wears holstered off her right hip and leg. She's draws on a variety of back up hand guns as well as a pump action shot gun.

Zoe Warren-Washburne has all the qualities we look for in a Southern lady and a person to serve as First Officer to our dear Captain Drew.

The Fan Club is indebted to erdprods on IMDb for details on Warren-Washburne’s career.