Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Report card for a Southern Lady

The young ladies and gentlemen over at the Crimson graded Drew's freshman year. We don't know much about being president of the World's Greatest University, but we do know a lot about being a Southern Lady. Here is her report card, as graded by those of us who know what's really important.

Fashion: A minus
A lady should look pulled together without drawing undue attention to herself, unless she is Queen of May.

Sometimes it is the person being graded who does the teaching, and that is the case with Drew and Fashion. She gives us little to talk about, and for that we commend her. We would like to see more creativity around piping and lapels, perhaps a subtle tweed from time to time, and we'd love to see a punchy color in the shells she wears under the jackets. But absolutely don't stop with the pearls!

Decorating: B minus
The office says President--what more could we ask for? The Aeron chair, though, is so Route 128. We'd like to see something a little more donnish.

Cooking: C plus
Drew knows her strengths and looks for ways to transcend her weaknesses. Sometimes the middle of the road is exactly where you want to be.

Animal Husbandry: Incomplete
Drew is poised to do some of her best work in this arena.

Gardening: Pass
We congratulate Drew on not making a mess (yet) of converting Elmwood into a dairy farm.

Conclusion: We cannot say that Drew exceeded our expectations for the year, because, really, our expectations could not have been higher. We can say with confidence that she surprised us in many many wonderful ways, and although we have had a few eensy eensy differences, which is not to be unexpected between even the best of friends, in the final analysis we are thrilled thrilled thrilled and can't wait to see what's next!

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